2020-06-16 22:02:53

Hi,
There are a couple reasons why I feel this title should be replaced with something more suitable.
One, blatant misgendering. Two, it doesn't really make any sense to begin with. I really don't want to have to keep deleting posts in order to be rid of this stupid title. Admins, could you please look into this. Thanks.

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2020-06-16 22:18:42

Lol, that's what people mean by taking things too far. Deleting post because of the title?

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2020-06-16 22:21:25 (edited by queenslight 2020-06-16 22:22:25)

Well, considering that Playboy Magazine is no longer in production, ... Well, ...

Enough said I guess...

2020-06-16 22:32:03

Isnt a playboy like a really rich person?

I am persecuted because of my writings, I think, therefore, that I should write some more.
-----
Eric Williams, First Prime Minister Of Trinidad and Tobago

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2020-06-16 22:35:28

Playboy is usually a word used in pornogriphy, see post three. Regardless of how you look at it though, it's a really dumb title, plus misgendering to boot.

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2020-06-16 22:39:15 (edited by JayJay 2020-06-16 22:41:47)

Hmm, If i remember correctly, channel 404 was the playboy channel. Heheh, I remember being a young kid, using the TV guide to learn to read, seeing sloppy wet titties 14 on the screen.

I was going to engage in this topic fully, but I'm really not feeling to get in the drama and step on people's toes. And wwhat I wwas going to say would have damaged people's feet like, broken bad

I am persecuted because of my writings, I think, therefore, that I should write some more.
-----
Eric Williams, First Prime Minister Of Trinidad and Tobago

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2020-06-16 23:20:02 (edited by Meatbag 2020-06-16 23:20:42)

@5, I understand, but I think you took it  far? its just a title, you dont nead to delete posts btw, just dont look at and poste 100 posts, which are easy giving how much drama to argue about in this forum, 100 posts will get you out  from this title

if you like this post, please wear a mask when you are in public, covid19 is painful, thank you

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2020-06-16 23:57:09

Both are technically correct.

Hmmm... I would go with "Playroom Partier" myself.

Considering Crazy Party has a Playroom world.

PS. No wonder why that channel was number 404... It was hopefully never to be found!

2020-06-17 00:04:52

Really!

@1,  It is just a title, and who acctually reads them besides you? I don't even notice them. This forum has much bigger problems than this. Mainly, the forum owners are never around, and the forum doesn't get updated very offten.

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2020-06-17 01:08:45

Ehh, I confess that I do, or I wouldn't have seen that one that she had about being the government of whatever it was.

When life gives you oranges, demand lemons since everyone else is obviously getting them.

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2020-06-17 01:33:51

Rofl yeah the American government thing was amusing.

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2020-06-17 06:38:54

That title was actually one of the winning results of the 2018 title competition, see This topic.
My only question is, if the admins change this title, do we need to get rid of some of the others?

For example dragon king and 9th Duke.
In the case of dragon king this might be a little difficult.

With our dreaming and singing, Ceaseless and sorrowless we! The glory about us clinging Of the glorious futures we see,
Our souls with high music ringing; O men! It must ever be
That we dwell in our dreaming and singing, A little apart from ye. (Arthur O'Shaughnessy 1873.)

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2020-06-17 07:05:06

I personally don't see why raising the issue of mis-genderment was necessary. It just feels like the issue was raised because it "could" be raised, given the OP's status as a trans woman.
You're  a trans woman. No one is trying to dunk on that at all. I don't see why  mountain needs to  made out of a molehill. It's just a title on a forum. I don't see why it needs to affect you this much.

A winner is you!
—Urban Champion

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2020-06-17 09:38:02

Before I begin, take note in the lack of moderation. No decision has been made as of now, I'm simply voicing the opinions that I apparently have to in 2020.

In order to raise the issue of misgendering in the context of a simple textual banner, I believe it pertinent to point out similar fundamental English inconsistencies.

You can't have manage, manufacture, command, manipulate, demand, German, human or hell even woman without including the three letters "man".
Ditto boycott, playboy, paperboy...


I won't pretend to personally understand the situations of those who have transitioned only to find a host of issues, discrimination, etc on the other side. That's all terrible and I have nothing but sympathy to give. I don't believe for a single second that society has fully embraced the concept, or is all accepting, or insert other utopian delusion.

Take a single step back, though, and examine the situation from a logical rather than emotional perspective.
No one is misgendering you. To misgender is to, verbatim definition, "refer to (someone, especially a transgender person) using a word, especially a pronoun or form of address, that does not correctly reflect the gender with which they identify."
No one is referring to you as a playboy, just as no one called you hunter grunt. If there were something to actually fear here, I would worry about being known as a plaything for however long it takes you to get past 200 posts.

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2020-06-17 09:56:46

Seriously Charlie don't you have bigger problems than a foreign title. It’s just a title. it is nothing more. and i think it is sad if you change this. we have bigger problems Right now. bud instead complaining that a black man got killed in the us fore no reason or that the corona wirus is still spreading your problem is a forum title. sad

Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. We have a small problem. All four engines have stopped. We are doing our damnedest to get them going again. I trust you are not in too much distress.

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2020-06-17 10:35:34 (edited by Draq 2020-06-17 10:37:23)

What I'm about to say may be seen as slightly offensive, and for that I sincerely apologize. No offense or disrespect is meant, and I'll make every attempt to be gentle here. I have no issues with trans men or women. Actually I think something similar was said in another post somewhere, and it actually goes beyond transgender folk. So, crossing my fingers and hoping this doesn't degenerate into a flame war that the moderators have to extinguish. smile

I've been noticing a trend, not just here, but everywhere in general. We get minorities who feel or are actually being oppressed. Sometimes it's race, disability, sexual orientation (or lack thereof), etc. This is, of course, unacceptable. No one should be oppressed or discriminated against because of who they are. It's my belief that as long as they're not hurting anyone, everyone has the right to identify with whatever they want. It's no one else's business.

however, what I'm starting to take issue with is when people blatantly call for radical and unnecessary changes to things that are just fine the way they are. They want to be heard, great. They want to be treated like everyone else, great. They want to be accepted, great. But do we really, honestly need to change every single thing to conform to all these different gender options? Isn't demanding that sort of taking things a bit far?

The title of Playroom Playboy applies to everyone. It doesn't matter if someone identifies as male, female, nonbinary, or whatever. It's just a rank, and honestly I've never, ever heard anyone born the opposite gender call for a change to names with the word king, playboy, etc. Now, that doesn't mean that no one has; I've just never seen it here. In a perfect forum world, I could see gender options and dynamic titles based on whatever option someone chose, but really... Can't this just be left alone? Is it really that big of an issue, or am I just insensitive? I sure hope I'm not. big_smile

Also, I believe she asked not to be called by her former name. I may not agree with this call for a title change, but can we please not blatantly disrespect her and her choices here?

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2020-06-17 11:37:34

Moderation:
Soren, your post constitutes a personal attack. Deliberately using Haily's deadname is pointless and serves absolutely no purpose. As such, I'm issuing an official warning. Mikes0916 did this yesterday; I'd have thought you would have seen from this example, and others. This behaviour simply will not be tolerated. It's also noteworthy that you received a warning for this exact same thing back in February, Soren. You can do better than this, and by now you know it's not right. I'd hate to have to ban you simply because you couldn't resist attacking Haily by using her deadname.

End moderation

My stance on this is somewhere in the middle.

A bunch of you are saying "this isn't a big deal" while simultaneously admitting that you don't have the experience to make that claim. In a big-picture sense, no it's not a big deal (Carter, your example of manage, manufacture and such misses the mark, I'm afraid), but clearly it bothers Haily enough that she doesn't want to see it. While I don't think every tiny little thing can possibly be catered for, this one is relatively easy.

My solution here would be to change Haily's title to something similar but less offensive to her, without actually changing the title itself. As such, it would be a custom title until she reached the next rank, at which point it would be set to whatever everyone else's rank is. This solves both problems neatly. It doesn't force a whole reorganization of ranks and doesn't directly impact anyone except Haily, but it does let her see a title that does not make her feel misgendered.
I do want to point out here that Haily's gender is something she has been wrestling with. By her own admission, there's been a lot of blowback in her personal life, and this is all relatively new. This suggests that perhaps her skin is a little thinner than it will hopefully become down the road; things which bother her now may not bother her later. I don't think any of us is really in a position to criticize her reaction too much.

Check out my Manamon text walkthrough at the following link:
https://www.dropbox.com/s/z8ls3rc3f4mkb … n.txt?dl=1

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2020-06-17 12:17:20

I want my title changed too. I am not a monkey. I am offended.

I used to be an aventurer like you. Then I took a knee in the arrow.

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2020-06-17 12:30:21

Please don't overcomplicate or mock this issue. It's not a joke.

Check out my Manamon text walkthrough at the following link:
https://www.dropbox.com/s/z8ls3rc3f4mkb … n.txt?dl=1

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2020-06-17 12:31:45

Come on mate. I can't help but shake my head. This topic seems kinda silly to me. Sorry Haily don't mean to offend you.

I used to be an aventurer like you. Then I took a knee in the arrow.

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2020-06-17 13:04:16 (edited by soren 2020-06-17 13:06:13)

haily i don't want to offend you. bud please just ignore  these small things

Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. We have a small problem. All four engines have stopped. We are doing our damnedest to get them going again. I trust you are not in too much distress.

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2020-06-17 13:17:29

Oh, My, Fucking, God, here we go again with someone over reacting to something that honestly is meaningless, seriously it's just a title on the forum, no one has called you a playboy.

while i get that there is a lot of shit around in the world right now, whether it's with race, gender, disability etc, but really getting this annoyed about a title that means nothing?

so would that in turn allow me to get this annoyed when i reach the title of sarahs's social circle? as i'm male an don't want to be called sarah? or is it saying i'm now female while i have that title?

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2020-06-17 14:02:58

@jayde
While I see what you're saying, I don't believe handing out custom ranks on a whim, temporary though they may be, to be a suitable solution unless we plan to make a habit of this in the future. After all, what prevents others from making the same request for reasons of their own devise?
Furthermore, there seem to be varying opinions on what constitutes an acceptable reason, and custom titles would needlessly add to the confusion. I don't think anyone was advocating for a complete restructuring, just a small name edit.

I would also like to reiterate that the title is by no means misgendering her by the formal definition. I'm sorry if she feels that way, but feeling a certain way doesn't automatically make it so.

Context is everything. Context would tell me that a female by the name Haily, who has 1405 posts, shares the same rank as everyone else with a matching post count. Giving her the benefit of a different title is creating further divisions. Deleting posts to avoid a simple title she never has to look at is... Absurd to the max. I dare say it would probably be good for her to do whatever she needs to do to ensure a different, more rational reaction next time, even if that's taking a break for the sanity of herself and tolerance of others.

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2020-06-17 14:05:55

zk, if it doesn't bother you, then I suppose not. Oh and, the title is Sarah's social circle. If we're going to start taking these titles completely literally, wouldn't this imply that you're part of this social circle, not actually Sarah?
To those of you saying that there are bigger issues, you're absolutely correct. I don't believe that I ever implied that this was some earth shattering problem that would send the forum crashing into a star, I simply made a kind request to the admins that something please be done about it. Jayde is correct in that it is a very easy fix, I've worked extensively with punBB in the past, I know what I'm talking about. If anything I'd say that many of you are the ones overstating the issue.
One last thing, Soren, I'm glad you're not trying to offend me. By all means, continue undermining me and my identity. Everyone loves a bigot, right?

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2020-06-17 14:09:26

Carter, I see what you're saying, but my argument comes down to the fact that some of the ranks are gendered by default. Male gendered, at that.
Is it a big deal? Is it going to break the world? Well no, of course it's not. It is, at worst, something I'd call a microaggression. The sort of thing you might have if you're filling out a form and you're asked to fill out your gender as male or female only (some people are nonbinary).
There are a lot of people who want to ask where the so-called slippery slope ends, and I can understand that. But I think we have to stop well short of flatly saying that so-and-so should not be upset by a given thing. As I pointed out, Haily's transition has been difficult, so I don't think telling her what should and shouldn't offend her is helpful.
Using your example of "Sarah's social circle", by the way, doesn't hit the mark either. That's not being misgendered, as you're not being called Sarah or implied female when you aren't. It's implying that you are part of Sarah's social circle, which does not in any way impugn or imply your gender.
Again, I see what you're getting at, we just don't agree.

I guess I'm more bighearted in this instance. My suggestion involved giving her a custom title that is as close to the original as possible, until she reaches the next rank. And yes, if anyone else came along with a legitimate reason, it's the work of forty seconds to tweak something like this, and I, for one, would not mind doing this at all.

Check out my Manamon text walkthrough at the following link:
https://www.dropbox.com/s/z8ls3rc3f4mkb … n.txt?dl=1

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