Before I started reading this topic, my head was in that weird state where you feel as if a headache might or might not be coming on. Well, that headache definitely is there now, and I feel exhausted and disappointed.

But yes, that most certainly is MY fault. I chose to open this topic knowing it would be terrible. I chose to continue reading when I got proof it was, and even when it was clear it was starting to effect me.

It is my fault because I could've also done ... almost anything else. I could've gone to read another topic. I could've opened Mastodon, where I have a nice set of filters for avoiding the topics that bring me the most stress. I could've watched some Youtube videos. I could've talked to people on Discord. I could've read a book. I could've ... I think you get the point.

I'm not victim blaming here. When someone is actually abusing you, hurting you, manipulating you, what not, it is not your fault. But on a public forum, nobody is telling you what to read, what to respond to, how to react to it. And even if you do encounter something that effects you negatively by accident, you can control yourself. That's one of the things that makes us different from other animals, is it not? We don't just act by instinct, we can control ourselves.

That's why, even though I'm not feeling all that good, I haven't written even a single fucking swear ... oh. Sorry.

So yeah, Dan, I cannot agree with your opinion that it is other people's fault that they make you angry with their posts on a public, easily avoidable forum. I can see how it might feel like you're stuck here, because you don't know where else to go. But the internet is huge. Unimaginably so. If you do not feel well here, then I promise, somewhere there is a community of people made out of pure awesomeness that would fit you better -- at least if you don't then start drama there as well.

I'm not saying you should leave -- though I must admit, the thought has crossed my mind, especially if you really believe it is not your responsibility to control yourself -- but if this place is really so bad for your mental health, perhaps a break might be wise. You have an incredible amount of power on here, far more than you could have in real life, and it's time to put it to good use.

because if you don't ...

I'm not quite sure what the point of this post was. It won't change anything. But in short, I really don't like you right now, because I'm getting sick of all this drama. But even so, I hope you'll feel well soon.

And this goes for the rest of you too, of course. Stay safe and well. Not just physically. Mentally, too.

Edit: Fixing a typo.

Hi.

@danGero, it is totally on you how you react.

You're stuck in the house? SO are tuns of others, you want to blame social media, delete social media. The only social media I have is reddit.

I think you said you were alone in your house, man be thankful you have a house to be alone in. I'd love my own flat but it's impossible to get one in London and it will still be impossible after the virus clears up or whatever's going to happpen to this country.

You could watch youtube, learn to cook a different dish if you have food items in your house, listen to podcasts, listen to the radio, read fan fiction, play an audiogame, read a book, I'm sure tehre's more but these are just the things I can think of.

I think the author of this thread is actually taking your advices to heart. He hasn't posted since half way through the last page.

Either that or he's just flat out ignoring this thread now, which comes to the same thing, really.  I'll acknowledge some of you in just a minute if you decide to keep on reading because again I think you're worth it, but I want to first say that in  reality, you can't make someone on a forum do anything, and that's the beauty of it.  We're going to prove it.  We're going to prove the point and will in all reality win the argument all the way through regardless whether he likes it or not.  But this isn't about winning the argument; it's about helping him own up to the facts.  If he comes back in here with another flaming post about how his life sucks and the forum is to blame, he'll prove it.  He doesn't have to.  ON the other hand, if he chooses to stay away from this topic and indeed even the forum, or at least not post for awhile, a good, long while, while he collects himself, nurses his bruised ego or whatever else the case may be, and put on his big boy pants as Liam put it, growing up, in essence, he'll be doing himself a favor and proving our point, yet again.  He doesn't have to.  whichever way he spins the ball at this point, he's got it in his cort and the choice is entirely his as to how he spins it.  I urge the rest of you to remain calm and collective.  As incensitive as some of the garbage is on here, the past 15 or so posts are proof that it doesn't have to be an absolute descent into madness.
And now, for some Acknowledging!  Hold on tight to your seats and don't wet your pants just because you got some nightmarish Nocturninja praise; I promise you it doesn't come with a cooky.  If that's what you're looking for, try your nearest Mcdonalds.
@Jayde, 96, you always shock me in a pleasant way.  As I keep watching you grow since taking the moderation hat I arguably may or may not have thrown away too quickly and putting it on, I've seen you take on a roll which was, at the time you took it, much greater than the one I first assumed, and which has become even bigger still since that time.  I cannot imagine the strain it puts on you and at times, as selfish as this is going to sound, I hardly want to, given the things I felt when closing down topics or just flat out handing down a simple moderation warning.  I do try to put myself in your shoes, however, but I know I'm not doing it justice given I'm not at all in your shoes and more than likely never will be.  It would not be an overstatement in my opinion to say that this community owes you for the great service you've put forth in your duties when you could have taken the choice to step back and tossed it all away.
@NevEd, I'm going to kill two birds with one stone with you, 97 and 100.  I love seeing you write when you actually decide to take it seriously as you did in these two posts.  You remind me of me in many respects.  You've got just enough snark in you to be a satirist but not to come across as an overly cocky jerk in your posts.  The fact that you humble yourself to the point of apology and that you're willing to more or less do a 180 yourself when you see that someone else is willing to walk the extra mile before you or when you see someone else putting their best foot forward is itself respectable.  Yes, I had a lot of the issues you have now.  I used to view my parents as religious fanatics who's life revolved around Jesus and church and cramming their beliefs down everyone's sthroat.  If you read my posts, you will discover that I'm on the other side now, and while I don't always showcase it, I don't believe it is always necessary to do so as a Christian, or at least not in the sense that many of them feel they must.  I believe in God, believe in Jesus and many of the other things you and others have heard where he's concerned, but don't expect you to believe them just because I do.  We'll leave it there and go on with our lives until you, or anyone else wishes to discuss them with me personally and not in a setting where everyone feels like they have an debate to win.  Otherwise?  Live and let live.  If free will is as real as christians claim it is and believe it to be, they must acknowledge it entirely and without trying to restrain others from it.  I try to live by that.
@defender, 99, thanks for the clarification.  I probably could have ascertained as much if I had chosen to carefully read your writing; don't blame it entirely on yourself.  I was short on sleep and feeling somewhat irritable... I just felt you were worht complimenting last night because you lost me with one post and hooked me with another.  :d
@simba, post 102, Might I kindly and humbly ask you to take a step back and look at what you wrote here?  I want you to self-examine for a minute.  would you take an I'm sorry right now from him?  I know I wouldn't.  He could come in here and throw together the most wonderfully worded apology he's ever written, and I still wouldn't take it.  Why?  Because he's done it before.  Do I forgive him for his attitude?  Sure!  Will I trust him to make right?  Not at present.  He needs to cool off and cool down.  He needs to really look at himself.  He needs to take off the gauntlet and stop trying to act so impulsively and with such knee jerk intensity, learn to accept that just because he feels like something is right or wrong does not dictate that he should be the one to act on it, particularly when he is so close to the subject matter.  I'm not going to say I've never gone off the rails because I have, even if I haven't done it on this forum... I honestly don't know and I would not try to deny it if it in fact is true that I've done it out here at least once.  the difference is that I always try to consult others rather than just listening to myself and my own gut feeling on anything.  Doing otherwise is, as I've stated elsewhere, the height of arrogance.
@Mayana, 103, that was well worded and nicely presented.  I don't even know what else to say that wouldn't just sound like empty praise, so I'm going to leave it there.  No that I really do like it and walk away with the certainty that while it may have seemed like you were just echoing what others have already said, your phrasing carried with it your own personal experiences and struggles and the certainty that you came to the realization that they were yours to handle as you chose.

@Jayde, part of the reason I haven't brought up any concerns is precisely that, that I know you are going to listen, which is why I'm waiting for something major rather than just quibbling back and forth about the minor stuff.  If I bring something up I want to know that you're going to take me seriously on the grounds that I'm not just bringing everything to your attention.  Honestly?  I think overall I can get behind more or less all you do and all you've done thus far.

FWIW, I apologize for my contributions to this thread.

I think that, at the point when I chimed in, it really just looked like shit-stirring. And it kind of blew my mind that there was nothing better to do than stir up a dead thread and get angry about it. And, while I wasn't angry at all about the previous thread, I put the keyboard down, sat out on the patio for a bit, then masked up and headed over to my girlfriend's for dinner.

Point is, I had something to do and somewhere to go. My heart truly does go out to those of you who don't. That isn't to say you have a get-out-of-jail-free card to do whatever you want. But mental health is a tricky subject, and me pointing out the problem and acting astounded that this was really happening, well, it missed the fact that there are underlying conditions at play here.

And I think that goes for others as well. One person points out that Dan can't and shouldn't blame others for his temper. Point made. If he says "nuh-uh, I'm gonna," that's fine. A point isn't automatically true just because the person who says it was the last to speak. Dan wasn't right here, but we all (myself included) didn't have to yell "Calm down. Calm down! CAAAAAALLLLLLLMMMMMMM DOWNNNNNN!!!" louder and louder and louder until we now have a,what, 5-page thread about one person's anger.

And Dan, if you're reading this, I am sorry that you're in the situation you are. FWIW, I've actually been in that situation myself, albeit not with a raging virus, so I can empathize. I spent about a year in a small town with a laughably bad public transit system and shitty walkability (seriously, my left foot fell in a 3-foot-deep hole that was perfectly sized for my shoe because my cane tip didn't land on it, and I showed up caked in mud.) I get it. I hope that you can find peace in your situation, and I hope that we do a better job of not making things worse for you. You do have a responsibility to control your temper. You know that, because I've seen you point it out before. But we all could have done a better job of not poking the bear here, and for my part, I intend to do that going forward.

Within the interestification of audiogamians on this forumanian my SQL databasificational storage container, I wish to state that do to nocturnalificationalisms vialationising my constatutionalational rightifications, I must here by translatify his postification in to understandably understandiblised english the better for the rest of us to understandify the darkest secrets of nocturnalism.
@112, I have been trying to ignore your situation. That being said, I fully know that your situation is something I have never encountered, so although I cannot claim to understand it, due to various differences, I will never be completely out of the question. I hope I can sympathize with you as much as I can, even if my belief is different from you and will always be different from you.
In this case, I will simply reiterate my statement here and elsewhere. I don't fully understand you and others like you, but I do accept you. Because I don’t understand, sometimes I may say something that makes you feel uncomfortable or even offends. I swear to correct myself at all costs. If it has happened and I don’t know it, I’m sorry here and now, and I’m sorry for you first, because sometimes some people don’t want to do it, just to avoid further inciting or aggravating the situation. Saying that I am not perfect is sometimes like hiding behind a mask. You can throw any insult under it in a subconscious, secret way. My goal is not to do this, but know that I cannot always do the right thing. This is a simple and clear fact.
Oh, is there any? I sincerely hope that you will be overwhelmed with humanity and all honest sympathy.
I don't know what my future will be, but I do know who owns my future.
Heh, I'm nowhere near as much of a linguistic guru as nocturnous over here, but I try. Oh, and remember, Spanish people are very, very expensive, and it may be difficult for them to understand.

ah cm'on people, talk normally

Oh heck yes! yes! nocturnus vs Dark's gonna be cool

But what if darkness pain and suffering bring some of us happiness

Nah, that just makes you a member of the BDSM community.