Grammar.

I'm afraid Wing of eternity, at the moment I am just finding the way you've written this universe hard to read, and so I just cant' take any of these details particularly seriously, since you've just put down a load of details and vague descriptions without anything to pin them on or any sense of order in the way they're written, you've just listed that there is this thing and there is that thing and this thing did this thing at this time and then at some point in the future something else happened and then we have something else, really I just can't get any of the details straight in my head with the way you've written this.

Sorry to bomb on the idea, I don't say this to be mean or as an attack against you personally, but there just isn't much else I can say, since right now I just can't really get a handle on what your trying to achieve with this idea, or what this so called universe is supposed to be, which might also explain why others haven't replied to this topic.

Perhaps if you write a slightly less hard to read description, and give us an idea what this universe is supposed to be for, setting for another story, rp game etc, it might be easier to have something more constructive to say.

@wing of eternity, that might be part of the problem.
you've presented a bunch of unrelated details and not given anyone reading a reason to care about them, neither in terms of relating them to a story of a given character, or written something with the epic quality of a myth which might interest someone in it's writing.

If Tolkien had written his universe like this it would've come out like:
there were some godlike beings called the valar, who created the world where men and elves lived, only one of the Valar had turned evil and created orcs and dragons and other dark creatures. So the Valar tried bringing the elves to their lands beyond the sea, which had got created to keep them away from Morgoth, the dark valar, but some of the elves rebelled against them and went back to middle earth, which was the bit of the world not ruled over by the valar where Morgoth was.
These elves that went to middle earth also wanted to get back the simarills which Morgoth had stolen, which had the light of the two trees of valinor in them, which were two trees that had been made before the sun and moon, since the  sun and moon were made out of the fruit of the two trees, and there were many battles with morogoth and the elves and other elves that lived in middle earth.

This is what I mean. I've given a lot of details of tolkien's legendarium here, but I've not put it in a coherent order or really explained much, neither have I really made any effort to invest people in the writing by working on poetry or mythic quality. Reading the above summary you would be forgiven for wondering "what the heck is the point!"

If this universe was just a skype conversation, fair enough, but if you want it to turn into a piece of literature, or a background for a game or anything else, you need to work on presenting it to the reader in a more engaging way.

I'm afraid Wing of Iternity, you seem to be thinking of things slightly the wrong way here.
If you want to write these details down purely for your own amusement, or to help you in future writing, fair enough.

if however you want to interest others in them, you really need to simply look into writing engagingly, since the worlds' best idea or universe won't mean anything if nobody is interested to read about it.

I'd suggest first, deciding what kind of story you want to tell.
You might be giving information about a character in this world, you might be telling us the creation myths, as Tolkien did in the silmarillion, but either way you have a distinct story you want to tell, since if you tell a good story, people will be interested in your universe.

At the moment for example, I don't really care about either the insectoids or the astral warriors, or the identity of this god or whoever imprisoned the insects.
Neither do I know much about either race other than that they are at war and a little of their weaponry, and neither do I really have much reason to care, as you haven't related it to characters, or given me poetic enough writing to really grab my interest I'm afraid.

far in the cornors of time where twin rivers meat the untraind eye, with wrathfull splender intertwine , where the esoteric element, and mystical knowledge meat, for , for one river was the mystical knowledge, the other was of imagination, giving the astral warriors the rase who satelled in the cristal realms, across the rivers, the cristal realms being the space in in which far away the rivers sprang, for it's unknown if the cristal realms created knowledge and imagination? or did the rivers create the realms. in any case the astral warrior are capable of using the metaphysical powers of the river to shift the cristal realms. eventually the astral warriors  created mankind, which wer a bit below the capabilities of there formmer architects. humans could rarely understand the underlieing intricasies of the web that was fordge by those astral warriors, that first wer there architects. It is cleare however that humanity has also the potenshal to rise above there condition, and choose with whom to side, even if there complete autonomy is invisible to them. the insectoids a rase that was gathering power for  by means of conquest saw the great splendre of the cristal realms , and in a swift decision, they decided that from no on, those reals would be there's to command. After all life is conflict, and by the same conflict the insectoids would thrive, and create there own war civilisation as they did in the pas, and if the astral warriors would be to weak to face them, then they weren't incapable to rule there teritory. The battle would decide who is strong, and weak.       
Enhemodius stood on the serin 18th cristal realm, with the cristals of energy sarrauding him in a never ending stream, as energy he could take a body of his own, but as an astrall warrior, that will be a grave llimitation, a lowering of his condition. . It was the path of the astral warrior to live in the cristal realms, as it was the way of man to live in there cityes on there physical ground, by summing a corporeal form, as it were. But for us the mystical rivers the ancient creations  that spring from splender with a deadly vortex they overwellme the cristal realms, but they never overreach. In time , those weren't manefestations of the mind, but actual rivers, that flowed and impaacted the energy of the cristal empowering the warriors. of course not all of them wer warriors, since this  metaphysical kombat art was only for the once experienced enough to train. bu there purpose wasn't kombat, but radder protection, self defence. The path of ccrwelty is for the untamed for the ordenary, of course doing nothing in your own serenity was also a sighn of weakness, a sighn that the insectoids wer more then happy to exploit. Enhemodius stood, and the cristal shiverd, in reverence
Enhemodius  said this war was out of our control, himanity would never choose to join us, "they are nnot ready too" Enhemodius thought a bbit saddenned by the prospect     of the insectoids destroying the worlds of the builders,, what power is that to destroy through conflict, and the

I wouldn't write to pander to the audience, I would start by writing compelling characters and let them develop until it is them who make the choices, not you.