I think my biggest community failure was my behavior when I was younger. I was arrogant, happily threw out misinformation like candy, acted ridiculously immature... I could go on. I mean, OK, I was young -- 12, 13, 14, and so on. (I joined the forum when I was 10... probably not my best moment/choice in life.) Ultimately, though I was young and naturally immature, I think I truly pushed the boundaries of what could be passed off as "immaturity" and what could be considered actually deliberately destructive. That, in turn, created a ripple effect; as more and more people heard "accounts" of my actions, they naturally developed either disgust, anger, hatred, outrage, etc., towards me. When they actually saw those actions for themselves, that ripple effect only intensified. The fact that I am probably one of the people on the forum who has received the largest number of bans in this forums history and the fact that people still demonstrate those feelings and reactions towards me to this day is, to me, proof enough.
I've definitely changed nowadays, and am a far, far different person from who I was even a year ago. I doubt I will be able to fully leave behind my past for a bit longer... I have no doubt that many people who knew me when I was younger would testify that I still have remnants, irrespective of how small they may be, of my past. Some may argue that my major flaw now is the degree of logicality I can (and will) go to, though I see this as also being beneficial. I'm also easily influenced, which is both a good and a bad thing. Finally, I very heavily depend on evidence. There have been times where I've provided evidence that was, in fact, not evidence, though I'm trying to work on that. Ultimately, right now I think that people who see me as the person who I was 2-3 years ago, or even further back, are just deluding themselves. I typically try not to deal with those people because I just don't see the point. Either way, I've done a lot of shit and done a lot of harm that I regret now,and if I could I'd apologize for it all. The reason I don't think I could is that I simply did far too much and my actions are what will ultimately determine whether I've changed or not. My actions, really, are my form of appology for what I did... because, really, only what I do can truly express my regret.
"On two occasions I have been asked [by members of Parliament!]: 'Pray, Mr. Babbage, if you put into the machine wrong figures, will the right answers come out ?' I am not able rightly to apprehend the kind of confusion of ideas that could provoke such a question." — Charles Babbage.