@124 Unlike a good chunk of the population, I'm not obsessed with sex. Sure, it's a nice bonus, and the urge is hardwired, but it doesn't totally control me. However, I agree with you that as blind people, we should be able to have the opportunity to experience those hookup experiences. Sadly, it's not feasible, and I'd much rather spend my time getting to know someone than simply jumping in because biology dictates I do so. I'm also nearly certain I don't want children due to my sister essentially being a perpetual child, which makes me take sex even more seriously. It has consequences if not properly prepared for, and it's certainly not a toy, even though many people make it out to be just that. If I knew I created another child like that, it would do something to me I may never recover from.

My experience on dating sites has been exactly the same as trying to find employment. People may talk to me for a while, then they disappear without any warning. If I was more interested in most things most people did I'd go places, but as it is, I'm afraid going anywhere will result in the same kind of treatment. I'll sit there pretending to be someone I'm not, be completely ignored, not know who to talk to, and ultimately feel just as alone. It's a horrible feeling to be surrounded by people, yet feel utterly alone because I don't really have anything in common with them. Perhaps I'll try finding book clubs, since that's about the only social gathering that wouldn't bore me to tears. I still have this crazy idea of finding a woman just as interested in computers as I am, but most don't care, so it's a pipe dream. Hell, most people don't like to read either.

Can it be? After over 20 years of alienation for refusing to play along with the sexity sex sex sex culture, there are finally a tons of people as ready to get away from the xxx bros in favor of, you know, almost anything else?

... Like paranoia over use of "anything" that requires hedging with adjectives like "almost" to leave legal room to argue that does not include things like murder, torment, or demonic possession?
Took you long enough, The West™. Crap, would being in 8th grade in the 2020s be actually tolerable?
... *sigh* Why can't I write something coherent and/or relevant, this week? Eh, this thread is a mess anyway, so might as well...

@Dark, if we have to handle our moves in life depending on the practical control we have on each involved topic, we couldn't do nothing at all. Indeed, we still would be in a era where we could not manage even our own economy nor access/give information, if not in an even prior era when we were thrown from a mounthain as soon as someone able-bodied realized we had a disability. If we don't fight for progressively getting more control of things, we won't get it. For that reason I say that the blind should not accept so naturally the idea that hookups aren't done for us.

@Chris, it will not be feasible if ourselves, the blind, don't fight for it and buy the idea that it is not possible. While I had good luck with employment and now I have a job which is hard to get even for many sighted people, in the dating xfera I'm tired of analyzing people and be just the good friend with interesting conversation. No philosofy nor whatever other intellectual activities avoid that some girls produce me wild boners and wanting at least a BJ.
I am like you regarding computers and books. Fortunately, the techies I meet with are aware that this is not a topic most girls care about, the same as anime (I'm not in that last one).

@130 boners and resulting urges are boners and resulting urges, regardless of how much one agrees or not on the idea of having various experiences for the only sake of having them. In fact, I am not interested at all in things like being able to drive an airplane, taking pictures or making YouTube videos, to name only a few visual-nature things so many blindies are obsessed with. Having said that, it is likely my brain is wired very similarly to my sighted peers regarding sex, other than the role of the voices.

The more saddest on this perhaps is not the fact that many blind guys aren't interested in hookups; this could be fine. The saddest one is that as a result, those of us who truly want to enjoy hookups can't get help even from other blind peers, which also, as a side effect, tends to reinforce some prejudices on sexuality of the blind in the sighted.

@131 I'm not sure what to say. I want sex as much as anyone else, but going around getting it in casual doses just leaves a nasty taste in my mouth. That of course is my opinion only. Most people are very nervous at least initially when they encounter blind, so I really don't think it would work. Interestingly enough, I had someone on Hinge ask me if I wanted to fuck. I kid you not, those were the exact words. Either this person didn't know I was blind, or didn't care. We didn't even have a conversation, it went straight to that. No thanks. I don't want to have casual sex with some random girl, only to wake up alone and feeling utterly empty inside. Communication is key, and I believe you'll be much happier after you've established mutual trust with the other person before committing to something as intimate as sex.

@132 I know what you mean. Perhaps my standards are too high, but ideally, I want someone who's at least as intelligent as I am with shared values. I wouldn't get along with someone that was always partying or in go go go mode, unless we could do activities both of us enjoyed. I don't want to deal with children and I really! don't want to deal with dog owners which makes it even harder. I'm not even going to try, because no one is getting rid of their dogs over me, and I'm sure as hell not getting stuck with them. I don't like them at all. They simultaneously disgust and frighten me. They say there's someone out there for everyone. Perhaps it's true, perhaps not. Either way, I'll wait as long as it takes, because I believe if and/or when the right person comes along, I'll be genuinely happy.

@132 this obsession of yours is rather wurrying. I've kind of been there when I broke up with a lady about 12 years ago and there were things involved that had me paranoid for her safety too but this behaviour is not healthy. If you did talk to her again, She would not be the person you dream of anymore. By the sound of things you married in your early 20's. People change over the years and if they aren't together during all those things that alter you as you grow older the difference becomes huge. Loosing a partnership is similar in a lot of ways to a death in the family. There are 5 stages of greeff commonly accepted. The last is acceptance. You haven't reached that point yet and it sounds like it's been a long time. I'm not trying to insult you in any way or to tell you you are wrong but I do think you may need counceling to help you accept what has happened and be able to move on with your life.

Would anyone willing to propose to the admins to create a sub domain for dating.audiogames.net so that topic like this won't ever exist again on this forum?

@138
It doesn't annoy me in the slightest. I found this topic amusing.

Funny how some people lament about not being considered purely on the basis of being blind and expressing that in a sort of pejorative tone, then go on to list very high and in some cases ridiculous criteria for a spouse. Interesting how that works.

@140, if you say about childs with severe mental issues as a joke on your sister it is right. If you say it seriously, as far as I know, actually the possibility is not as absolute as we may believe in case of a children of, lets say, a blind-sighted partnership. Rater, the likelyhood of fault results increases as more and more generations with a same characteristic get involved, since genetic variability is increasingly reduced. So no, don't be afraid of making a child with mental issues just because we are blind.

@141 I agree.

Online dating sites. Obviously depends where you live how far you can travel etc, but I met nearly all my girlfriends that way, sometimes went on 2 or 3 dates per week. It can be done. Met my wife that way as well. I got ghosted a lot yes, but you just gotta move on and leave those idiots behind.

@144: "Be talkative and flert" — and just like that, you lost me.
@145: Dating sites give almost no information and using them is, if the internet is to believed, a full-time job, even without the blindness penalty. It kinda seems like anyone who is desperate enough to scrape that barrel ... probably reeks of desperation and thereby repels the majority of potential dates.

@thread: So what I'm saying is, 144 and 145 might be helpful for, like, one or two readers, but probably antihelpful for everyone else.

To paraphrase Katie Lucas, most social skills advice contains a section best summarized as "do magic here." And that applies to dating advice as well.
I'd really like to end this on a more positive note, but most of the obvious stuff is kinda broken in The West™.
(CAE tangent™: My pedantry cannot stand the term "The West". It refers more or less exclusively to Europe and descendant cultures, like the Commonwealth and the US. But Australia and New Zealand are definitely more south than west, most of Africa is in-line with Europe on the east/west axis but is not generally included in "The West", and I really can't tell if Latin America and the Caribbean are included or not, the way people use the term. If we're going to be so Eurasia centric, would be nice to be more clear about that. /rant)

@146, my girlfriend is fully sighted.