2018-04-15 07:27:50


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2018-04-15 11:16:42

Hey I had a link in mine too, surprising since that was two days ago...

This... -- Is CNN'.
Well Ted, it sure looks like there's been uh, quite a bit of violence around here
"aaoh, that violence was terrible'!"
Yeah it was, pretty bad.

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2018-04-15 16:12:57

Microphone; Realtek Audio; Default Device  1 of 2

yo! so I'm working on programing, it's really hard. But I'll tell you where you can contact me if your stupid enough to do so.
Contact information:email: [email protected]
Skype: Brennan Draves
I'm usually found on online games, chatting, and being warned bye admins for talking to much, f**k you admin!

2018-04-15 21:16:41

We tend to see our in-group as characterized by its everyday behavior, and the out-group as characterized by its extreme behavior.

Some of my games
Keep up to date by following @Jeqofire on twitter!
Ear Ninja?

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2018-04-15 23:39:00 (edited by cmerry 2018-04-15 23:40:30)

SamTupy is a developer of redspot.
Oh, when did I copy this? He wasn’t even on when I was on. Rofl.

2018-04-16 17:19:02


Some of my games
Keep up to date by following @Jeqofire on twitter!
Ear Ninja?

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2018-04-16 18:23:16

Christmas is  like sex. All that buildup and it's over in a few moments....then you spend the rest of the day regretting it
Mita: You gotta unwrap it first
JaceK: That's going in my clipboard for this whole conversation.Also, no, condoms do not make wrapping paper....
Mita: In my house they do
JaceK: You just got uninvited from every gathering I have now woman!

If in doubt, chocolate and coffee. Enough said.

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2018-04-16 18:29:10

Adult bronies in your area

....I'm messiing with one of those fake dating ads to see if I can make it say adult idiots in your area and get it on an ad server. Irony is I run ublock soooo

If in doubt, chocolate and coffee. Enough said.

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2018-04-16 20:01:11

A problem occurred with this webpage so it was reloaded.

Some of my games
Keep up to date by following @Jeqofire on twitter!
Ear Ninja?

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2018-04-17 01:34:56

0) Back

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2018-04-17 02:21:16

It is important to note at this point that the Extinguishing Charm has no effect whatsoever on an angry dog.

Some of my games
Keep up to date by following @Jeqofire on twitter!
Ear Ninja?

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2018-04-17 02:52:24

you can not close this window, this window is already closed.

if duct tape doesn't fix it, you haven't used enough.

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2018-04-17 04:00:27

0) Back

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2018-04-17 05:37:14

Item: simple plain grey gloves (n1ukk9ku44x4icgx7ktzmtdifyma)
Weight: 2  Size: 1'0"  Level: 19
Type: ARMOR   Composition: FABRIC   Defense: 1 ac-apply
Weapon damage: 2 to 4 whip, 11 strength to use.
INT by 1
WIS by 1
MANA by 4
This item is bound to your account.

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2018-04-17 07:32:32


"I used to be an adventurer like you, then I took an arrow in the knee."
guards, skyrim

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2018-04-17 18:59:21

This next one's a track from a game, short little orchestral piece.

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2018-04-21 13:54:32

You've played the game for 1 day 15 hours 49 minutes and 44 seconds..
You took 100043 steps.
You obtained 555636 gold and spent 381110 gold.
You won 1999 battles, lost 0 battles, and fled from 0 battles.
You dealt 333968 damage and you suffered 61165 damage.
You've seen 146 unique Manamon and caught 24 unique manamon out of a total of 158.

Oh! It's my manamon stats! Don't remember when I copied this though. I had forgotten about it. LOL.
Also, 1999 Battles won? Come on! Seriously? One more and I would've won 2000 Battles!

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2018-04-21 17:45:27

To abuse the analogy a bit, if we have neither chicken nor egg, but plenty of dinosaurs, then ... ah... I was going somewhere with that, but then it turned into a "drop an asteroid on it" metaphor.

Some of my games
Keep up to date by following @Jeqofire on twitter!
Ear Ninja?

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2018-04-21 18:40:42

Scrolling Battles Pro!
By Ultrocity Audio and NS studios.

1. introduction.
Welcome to scrolling battles pro, a highly advanced and fun audio game! This game, which is the result of the ongoing colaboration between Ultrocity Audio and NS studios, has been written from the ground up to have smoothness of gameplay, ease of use, lots of features, and to provide  countless hours of entertainment to it's players. It includes a fully formed AI, online death matches, mouse and joystick support, and much more!

1.1. credits
This game is being developed by Mason armstrong (Ultrocity Audio), and Nikola Stojsic (NS studios).
Documentation written by Devin Gutierrez, modifications by NS studios and Ultrocity Audio.
some sounds and music used in this game have been custom-made for this game, by NS studios.

2. minnimum system requirements
1.3 ghz single core processor
512 mb of ram.
~12 mb disk space for the game and all of it's files.
Windows XP
a Windows compatible sound card.
stereo speakers or headphones
connection to the internet for the multiplayer mode.

3. menu structure and the main menu.
Here are the keystrokes for the available methods of input in menus. Please note that unless otherwise stated, all menus are side scrolling, which means instead of going up or down, you go left or right through the items.

A. keyboard:
scroll through items: left or right arrows.
Select an item: enter.
Exit menu: escape.
Change menu music volume. Page up/down.

B. Joystick:
scroll through items: push the stick right or left
select an item: button A
exit menu: button B

C. mouse:
previous or next item: move the mouse left or right
select an item: left click
exit the menu: right click

3.1. The main menu
Multi player game:  Goes to the multi player menu, where you can connect with friends or enemies from across the globe and battle it out on the Ultrocity server.
Single player game: allows you to practice your skills against AI enemies who will try to destroy you at every turn.
Preferences menu: allows you to change options in the game.
Exit: (Don't!) Allows you to exit the game and go back to the dull real world.

3.2. the preferences menu.
Force SAPI5 speech method: allows you to force SAPI5 to be used even when one of the supported screen readers are active. (this is useful for playing under Wine/Wineskin)
Voice chat: Allows you to select if you want voice chat or not.
hold/press O to voice chat: allows you to alter how the key for voice chatting (O) works - whether you want to hold it, say something, and release once you're done, or press it, talk, and press it once more when you're done.
clear saved data: Allows you to reset your single player game to default stats so you can start over.
Select Output device: Allows you to set the sound card you'd like the game to use.
select the default joystick/gamepad: self-explanatory - allows you to choose one of the connected joysticks/gamepads (if any) as default

3.3. multiplayer game: allows you to play online.
Sign in - allows you to use your account credentials to gain access to the multi player server.
Sign in as - allows you to sign in with the different account
New account - allows you to create a new account on our server, that you can use to play online.
Enter/re-enter registration information - allows you to enter or re-enter your registration credentials you receive upon purchasing the online features of the game. This unlocks the other items in the menu.
Go back - takes you back to the main menu.

4. offline gameplay.
Here are the commands you will need to use in order to play
A. keyboard controls:
up: Jump
left or right arrow: walk
Down arrow: Face down.
G with any arrow: Move the camera.
G with D: Check camera's coordinates.
G with T: play the sound at the camera's current position
S: check the effective range of your tobds.
shift+left/right/up/down arrows: use tobds
P: Check power.
V: Check viciousness.
space: fire.
1 through 5: select weapons
A: Check ammo.
R: Reload weapon.
T: spawn time bomb
shift+t: See how many time bombs you have.
M: place a mine
Shift+M: check how many mines you have
Hold alt while walking: glide
F: Check glider fuel.
c: check x and y coordinates as well as the map you are on.
F3: Toggle beacons.

B. Joystick:
walk left/right: push and hold the stick left/right
jump: push the stick upwards
clime up/down: push and hold the stick up/down
fire: button A
reload: button B
exit: button C
use tobds: hold the button X and push the stick left/right/up/down
place the timebomb: hold the button X and press the fire button (A)
place the mine: hold the button X and press the exit button (button C)
check the ammo for the currently selected weapon: hold the button X and press the reload button (B)

C. Mouse:
move left/right: move mouse horizontally.
jump: move upwards
clime up/down: move the mouse vertically.
switch weapons: scroll wheel
fire: left click
reload: right click
exit: middle click

4.1. objects
From time to time, objects will spawn on the map which you can pick up. they can have a number of effects, or contain items. they could boost your health, speed, spyglass range and power, give you ammo, glider fuel, or time bombs.
Beware, however, that items can and will break  from being hit with a weapon, rendering them useless.

4.2. viciousness and power
Viciousness, which you can check by hitting v, is the overall difficulty level of enemies. at certain levels, enemies will start getting very difficult to defeat. Power is how difficult it is for enemies to defeat you. it is a value that encompasses your maximum walking speed, your resistance to damage, and many other things.

4.3. weapons.
You and your enemies are equipped with five weapons: your fists, a laser, which has faster firing speed in exchange for less damage, a handgun, which is useful in close-range combat, a machine gun, which is good for really almost anything, and grenades, which can be used to devastating and deadly effect to kill someone without being detected.

4.4. time bombs. and mines
press T to detonate the time bomb - it will start counting and once the time is up, it will explode and destroy everything in the radius of about 300 squares
press m to place a mine - once placed, they will make the quiet sizzling sound, pay attention to it, because whoever steps on one is instantly dead!

4.5. enemies.
enemies are very smart in this game. unlike most audio games, where enemies run up and attack you until they or you die, enemies can make good choices about who to go after, which weapons to use and how to use them, clime, go after other enemies and your allies, use time bombs, retrieve and break items, and much more.

4.5.1. allies.
Your allies act very similarly to enemies, but they won't neither attack each other, nor you, prefering to hear the snap of enemy bones instead.

4.6. transoptical bi-directional spyglass, tobds for short
You are equipped with a device, the tobds, which is a pair of headphones, attached to  two speakers on the outside which blast out an inautible, high-frequency ping in both directions at once. this returns information on obstacles, enemies and terrain changes within it's effective range, which you can check with the S key.
It's effective range can be improved by objects you pick up which increase the quality and volume of it's VHF, (very high frequency) speakers, resulting in an increase in range. it will tell you about enemies,  their current health and equipped weapon, changes in terrain, fires and time bombs. it will say something like, object, 42 feet. use shift+left, shift+right, shift+up and shift+down arrows to scan in those directions.

4.7. glider.
You also have a glider, which allows you to do amazingly high jumps, as well as zoom across the map at high speeds.
However, the glider requires fuel to function. you don't have any when you start out, so it will be necesary for you to find and retrieve some fuel before you will be able to operate it.

4.8. Beacons
Beacons will play a little repeating blip sound wherever there is an enemy or a player.

5. online play.
Online play allows you to connect with other people from across the globe to show them who's the boss, so to speak.

5.1. differences between offline and online game modes.
Online gameplay has some fundamental differences from single player; the most obvious of which, are needing an account and registration. upon logging on to the server, you should hear it tell you what version of the server software it is running, and the date it was updated on. from that moment onward, you are vulnerable to attacks from other players, so get objects quickly.
Please note! that objects you get in single player, for obvious reasons, do not cary over to the multi player server.
In online play, there is no such thing as power or viciousness, as the players can freely be as powerful/vicious as they want to be.

5.2. communication and interaction with other players.
the server allows you to communicate with other players in a variity of ways. for instance, to check who is on the server with you, press shift+slash. it will either tell you who is on the server, or say, "You are alone."
to chat with other players, press slash by itself. you will be in the input box where you can type your message.
There is also a voice chat feature, accessible by holding or pressing the O key, which will allow you to talk as if you were in the map. Simply hold or press O (bassed on your preferences - default is hold), talk and release or press once more once you're done and the game will play back your voice chat at your current position.
It is also possible to give the feedback about the game. Simply press slash to enter the input box, and type slash feedback space your message. This will transmit your message to the developers, thus making this a good way to report bugs, suggest/request things, etc.
This would be a good time to talk about the command for finding the location of another player. to find out where someone is, type into the chat box: slash where, followed by the name of the player, such as Masonasons.
it should say something like, "Masonasons is at 78, 0." meaning he is on the ground at X position 78.
You can kill a player just as you would an enemy in single player mode. there really isn't that much difference.

5.2.1. the input box
Input boxes are used when you want to chat, when you enter your login information, etc.
how to use it:
to type something, just type regularly.
to review what you've written, press up or down arrow
you can also review the entered info character by character - press left or right arrow
if you wish to jump at the beginning of the entered info, press home. If you wish to jump at the end, press end.
to delete the character, press backspace or delete
you will hear the speech feedback as you type. If you don't want this, press f2. This will toggle between speaking characters you type and not speaking them.
you will hear the beep when you enter the capital letter in. If you wish to change that behavior, press f3. This will toggle between the capital letter treating modes: the default is beep, there's also speak cap, which says cap before the letter, and there's treat no different, meaning you will get the same speech feedback for the capital letters as you would with the lowercase ones.

5.3. achievements
In online play, there is a dynamic achievements system. to check your achievements, press the slash key to enter the chat box and type, slash achievements, meaning the slash key, followed by achievements.

6. Registration and demo limitations information.
Scrolling battles pro's online features are a one-time fee of $5.
if you do not have a key, then the multi player menu will contain: purchase your license, and enter registration information. it will ask you for your registration name and key. only after the game is able to validate with the license server that your key is valid will you gain lifetime access to the online features of scrolling battles pro.
The only limitation of the demo version is that you will not gain access to the multi player feature.

6.1. registration system
Once you purchase your license, it gives you the lifetime access to our multiplayer service.
You may use the same license to register other computers with it, but only may you have 5 computers registered at the same time.
Once you have all 5 computers registered, you may not register any more computers.
If you ever wish to swap one of the registration slots from one computer to another, just unregister one of the currently registered computers, and you will have a free slot again.
This way you always have 5 slots for you to use on any machine.
Say that you've registered this game on your desktop computer, your laptop, your windows tablet, on your wife's laptop and on her windows tablet, too.
And then, she wants to sell her tablet. So, what you do is unregister the game from her tablet, and then you can use the slot you've just freed again on another machine, e.g. if she buys another tablet, you could register that one, never using no more slots than 5.

7. how to order.
To order Scrolling Battles Pro from us, please visit http://ultrocity-services.ddns.net/sbp
You will see the form asking you to input your desired registration name, as well your e-mail, which will receive the registration license upon purchase.
Then click the PayPal button and complete the payment.
Once your purchase is complete, we will e-mail you with your registration license.

7.1. notices
The e-mail with your registration license won't arrive immediately, this is because we process the payments manually, because of the security risks.
The rock bottom time for getting back to you is 48 hours
if we are unable to provide you with the registration license in the time for some reason, you will be refunded.

8. conclusion
We sincerely hope you enjoy Scrolling Battles pro, as we have been dedicating hours of work to it.
We thank you for your support, wish you have lots of fun and hope you find this game entertaining.

8.1. copyright and terms of use
Copyright: 2015 Ultrocity audio and NS studios, all rights reserved.
Scrolling battles pro is the copyrighted game.
Reverse engineering, decompileing, decoding, decrypting, disassembling, or in any way deriving source code or any of the components from the Software, is prohibited and may result in the civil or criminal penalties permitted by law.
It is also strictly forbidden to modify or manipulate the software for the pourpose of having the advantage over other users of the service (included but not limited to speed hacking), as well as modify, manipulate, corrupt, redirect or intercept data going back and forth on the network with the goal to break the security or to harm the server, the service in general, or other users of the service.
The material shipped with the software (included but not limited to sounds, music and dynamic libraries) may not be redistributed, modified, extracted, recorded, decrypted, or derived in any shape way or form, used for anything else except this software, without the Authors' consent.
You are permitted to play the online mode, only in case you own the registration license yourself. Using the registration license you did not purchase, as well as sharing your purchased license to third-parties, is forbidden, and will result in the permanent license diactivation.
Should you abuse the service, and/or break these terms of use, Ultrocity and/or NS studios are permitted to take action, included but not limited to the permanent registration license deactivation.
roooooooooooooooooofl, sbp readme, no idea when i copied this

2018-04-21 22:07:25

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12591706/1 … ay-Vampire
a fanfic? Okay then...

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2018-04-22 00:07:17

The one and only mason logged on to the server.

2018-04-22 00:44:50

cthulhu : battle (waiting)
That came from the crazy party server list.

You can get my Tactical Battle scripts here, with a documentation included. They allow various things that are not normally possible in the game.
https://www.dropbox.com/s/dzsmqv2pgqvu1 … h.zip?dl=1
If you have questions about my scripts, you can e mail me. You can also modify them as much as you want.

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2018-04-22 08:42:09

Dear Contestants,
I really think it’s super funny
When you lose all your money.
Stop the board please, I can’t wait
Oops, I think you stopped too late.
You think we’re all mean and spammy.
Sincerely yours,
The whammy

2018-04-22 08:49:47

Redspot version0.91... not responding...

2018-04-22 17:11:06

(I work for a fast food corporation as an assistant store manager. Our store is going to have its 18-month inspection conducted by senior company management. In addition, the owner and senior management of our own franchise group will be present. Consequences for failing the inspection range from the store being put on probation to outright dismissal of any member of staff deemed to be directly responsible for the failure in severe cases. As a result of this, our store schedules for a considerably beefed-up evening shift that works until midnight to complete major cleaning tasks, and then a three-strong overnighter team to focus on specific areas and generally raise the standards as high as they can go. The opening staff also arrive at six rather than seven to allow for any last minute do-overs of anything deemed to still not be up to standards. The opening shift is lead by our most senior shift manager, and I arrive at seven, mainly to ensure all the needed paperwork is ready for the senior management when they arrive at eight. I arrive to find the opening staff in a frenzy, and my normally very relaxed shift manager red in the face with fury.)
Me: “What the hell’s going on? Almost all of what you’re doing should have been done by the overnighters.”
Shift Manager: “Yeah, I know. [Overnight Manager] basically had them do nothing all night, so far as I can tell; even drink cups and lids haven’t been stocked. And then he, [Female Crew Member #1], and [Female Crew Member #2] just walked right out as soon as we clocked in.”
Me: “Terrific. They’ll have to be dealt with later. Keep at it; I’ll ring everyone who’s due in at eight to see if they can get in earlier, and then I’ll come help. The paperwork can wait.”
(I ring all staff and get three of them to come in ASAP, and then help the shift manager get everything as sorted as we can in the 50 minutes we have left. At 7:30, the business manager arrives and also questions why it’s still such a mess, but also thankfully informs us that all parties of senior management are stuck in traffic and will be at least 45 to 60 minutes late. We eventually get everything just about ready at 8:15, just after we open to customers, and I retreat to the office to sort the paperwork. The business manager comes with me, leaving the floor to the shift manager.)
Business Manager: “So, any idea what went wrong this morning?”
Me: “[Shift Manager] said he arrived this morning and it looked like the overnight shift did pretty much nothing and walked out as soon as he started. I really don’t get it; he’s normally a solid worker, and it’s not like we gave him a pair of idiots to work with.”
Business Manager: “Yeah, [Female Crew Member #1] and [Female Crew Member #2] are both in line for crew trainer promotions; I really don’t get it. I’m going to check the store cameras and see if I can figure out what happened.”
(A few minutes pass whilst the business manager logs into the CCTV system and starts fast-forwarding the recording. He gets to midnight, when the evening shift leaves without anything unusual happening, and at this point all three people from the overnight shift are visibly working. However, barely five minutes after the evening shift leaves…)
Business Manager: “I think I’ve found the source of the problem.”
(I turn to look at the screen to see the overnight manager go into the crew room to return with two six-packs of beer and a large bottle of vodka. He immediately cracks open a can and passes the vodka to the girls. The next hour of footage is the overnight manager going through seven of the cans whilst the girls go through roughly half the vodka, using the drinks machine for mixers. After around 90 minutes of them drinking, things are clearly starting to get a little ropy. The cameras don’t record audio, so we have no idea what’s being said, but one of the girls proceeds to peel off her work top, pants, and bra and does several laps of the kitchen in nothing but her shoes and panties, using a burger box to cover her chest. We already have more than enough evidence to sack all three of them, but we are worried as to how much further things went, since obviously we’re working with food and contamination is a serious danger. At this point, we have one of the women still only dressed in her panties, and the manager and other girl looking on; however, from here on, it only gets worse. The already mostly undressed girl encourages the other two to undress, and shortly after, both girls and the manager are stood all dressed only in their underwear. The business manager and I exchange very worried glances, because we know where this is going. We are simply dumbstruck at what we’re watching, but after a minute we get it together, and I march out to the shift manager on the floor and pull him aside.)
Me: “Okay, we found out what happened. I’ll need you for a statement later. Right now, I need you to fully clean grill two, and I mean a really good clean. I’m going to clean down [kitchen counter area] with disinfectant, and a lot of it.”
Shift Manager: “Sure. Do I even want to know why we’re doing this?”
Me: *after looking around to be sure none of the crew will hear me, whispering* “[Overnight Manager] banged [Female Crew Member #2] whilst she was bent over the grill.”
Shift Manager: *with a very shocked expression* “Sure. I’ll get right on it.”
(We decontaminate the affected areas, and after a discussion with the business manager, we opt to not turn the affected grill back on and just cite an electrical fault during the inspection. Then, we finally welcome the senior management when they arrive. The inspection goes just about all right, and we pass with a mark just slightly above the minimum requirement. The business manager at some point informs our group management that there was an “incident” with the overnight shift, but says it’s better discussed after the inspection. Once the corporate management leave, the business manager and I return to the office with our franchise group management to discuss the results. The owner is somewhat displeased with our results, given we got a significantly better passing mark for the previous one. In response, the business manager simply asks that they watch the CCTV footage for themselves. The senior management watch in disgust as we proceed through the drinking, to the stripping, and then on to the adult activities.)
Business Manager: “How should we proceed?”
Owner: “Obviously, fire all three of them right this instant. I cant believe anyone would be so depraved as to have sex on the grill; it’s utterly disgusting. I’ll reach out to my food safety contact and lawyer to see if, and how, we can press further punishment on them. Also, I’ll see if insurance will allow for a replacement grill; that one’s been soiled permanently, in my eyes. If we have to buy a new grill outright, then so be it.”
(Ultimately, all three members of staff were fired, and they then faced further legal action in the form of a lawsuit from the owner. It concluded in them having to pay between them for the cost of the new grill, which came to around £15,000. In addition, all three were blacklisted and have lifetime bans from working in the food industry in any capacity. None of them could ever provide a satisfactory explanation as to why they actually did what they did. The closest we ever got was that they planned to just have a couple of drinks to motivate them and it got out of hand. Given the amount of alcohol on hand, we obviously didn’t accept that claim.)

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