2014-04-01 20:32:16

Sinse i know I'm not the only Doctor who fan here, I thought people might enjoy this particularly ironic little review of the second  doctor story Evil of the daleks.

It (and lots of other reviews), can be found Here on this page which is a page on the very good Doctor who ratings guide

I like this reviews site because it is intended as a tad more formal than a lot of places, so reviews have to be reasonable quality, and there are lots of people there who I find even though i disagree with their opinions or conclusions about Doctor Who,  they're interesting to read and let me think. heck, there are even a couple of reviews there by yours truly as well.

Either way, I promised a laugh so here it is, in the form of  Antony Tomlinson's  review of Evil of the Daleks and a little problem our favourite pepper pots of peril have in questioning orthority.


The importance of questioning orders... by antony tomlinson
15/8/04
[On Skaro, a group of black-headed Daleks stand before the throne of the Emperor Dalek,
awaiting his orders. Eventually the giant, slightly phallic figure begins to speak...
emperor: this is my new plan. we will try to discover the "dalek factor"
dalek 1: what's that?
EMPEROR: I'm glad you asked. It is the characteristics that make Daleks what they are. It can be stored in a liquid.
DALEK 2: Are you sure? How can a series of personality traits be stored in a
liquid? What, is this liquid... is it the Dalek "soul" or something? Or ectoplasm?
That's not really very scientific, is it?
emperor: silence - do not question my orders.
dalek 1: how will we discover the dalek factor?
EMPEROR: Good question. We have a device that can "record" the "factor" of
any species.
DALEK 2: Oh good, so we'll just record the Dalek factor by pointing this device
at a Dalek.
emperor: erm, no - for some reason we have to point it at a human first.
dalek 2: why?
EMPEROR: Do not ask questions (to be honest I don't know - ask one of our
technicians - they're the red ones).
dalek 1: so we'll just find a human, and point it at him.
EMPEROR: Not just any human - we'll point it at the companion of our arch
enemy, who always foils our plans as soon as he turns up...
dalek 2: surely that's a stupid idea...
emperor: right, that's it - exterminate dalek 2.
[dalek 2 is killed].
EMPEROR: We will track down the Doctor and his companion - we believe that
they can be discovered in the 20th Century.
dalek 3: so, we'll go to the 20th century.
EMPEROR: No, we'll go to the 19th Century, because even though we can travel
in time, as we will frequently do in this story, some mad beardy bloke is doing
some experiments with mirrors in the 19th Century.
dalek 1: right... erm, how will we control the humans there?
EMPEROR: We'll find a character that is totally superfluous to the plot, and we'll
try to control his brain by putting a box in his coat pocket. Then we'll fail
completely to control his mind and end up kidnapping people's daughters and
promising to turn metal into gold instead.
dalek 3: this is a stupid plan...
emperor: exterminate dalek 3!
[dalek 3 is dispatched]
EMPEROR: Where was I? Oh yes, then we'll track down the Doctor by nicking
his TARDIS in the 20th Century, and luring him to an antique shop where there is
a photo of him that he'll touch and get gassed, and then we'll take him to the 19th
Century...
dalek 4: ok...
EMPEROR: Once there, we'll get the companion to do a series of tasks, whilst
getting the Doctor to record his "human factor". Then we'll make him put the
human factor into three experimental Daleks.
DALEK 1: And I suppose we will then quickly destroy these three Daleks before
they start questioning your orders and cause a Dalek revolution.
EMPEROR: No, we'll just lose track of them completely and allow them to mix in
with all the other Daleks.
dalek 4: erm...
EMPEROR: Then we'll take everyone to Skaro, and try and "infect" the Doctor
with the Dalek Factor which we've now got hold of somehow.
DALEK 1: Of course, the Doctor is not human. So, do we check that the Dalek
Factor will affect non-humans in the same way that it affects humans?
emperor: nah...
dalek 4: oh for heaven's sake. this is a rubbish idea.
emperor: i will not tolerate insolence!
[dalek 4 is blown away].
EMPEROR: Anyway, we'll then get the Doctor to spread the Dalek factor around
the universe in his TARDIS.
dalek 1: why don't we use our more reliable, and faster time machines, from
the chase
and
the daleks' master plan
?
emperor: oh i'd forgotten about them. we'll pretend we haven't got them.
dalek 1: ok...
EMPEROR: Well, anyway, we'll finally leave the Doctor to roam around the
place with his phial of human factor, and fail to put much of a guard around me.
dalek 1: that's best part of the plan so far.
emperor: what? well, anyway, that's the idea. it is bound to work.
DALEK 1: [to self] This is the stupidest plan you've had since the one where you
told us to hollow out the Earth and drive it around like a dodgem car.
emperor: what?
DALEK 1: An excellent plan Emperor. I will carry out your orders straight away
(I can't believe that this nonsense was written by the same man who wrote the
terrific
power of the daleks
).
[Dalek 1 leaves to face his inevitable doom. The Emperor looks very pleased with himself.
There is no way that the Doctor will defeat him this time...]

With our dreaming and singing, Ceaseless and sorrowless we! The glory about us clinging Of the glorious futures we see,
Our souls with high music ringing; O men! It must ever be
That we dwell in our dreaming and singing, A little apart from ye. (Arthur O'Shaughnessy 1873.)

2014-04-01 20:44:24

Hi,
Absolute lols. Its true though, that's just about what the whole episode was.

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2014-04-01 22:39:14

Glad you like, I  literally laughed out loud when i read that one too.

Funnily enough I actually really  enjoyed Evil of the Daleks, I borrowed an audio described tape version from a friend of mine when i was 12, (one of those sort of semi radio play things the bbc  made to replace missing stories), , and thought the story was great, what with cheery humanized Daleks playing trains, the Second doctor tootling away on his recorder and prancing around like a loon but somewhow working everything out, and the Emperor Dalek who sounded awsome (tom baker's naration was good too).

Obviously I never realized the story had plot holes larger than the Eye of Harmony big_smile.

I still rather enjoy it though, which says  something for the generalized acting and  fun of the story, ---- then again compared to what Steven Mophat's been up to it looks like a bastian of order and sense, so maybe my tolerance has just got better big_smile.

With our dreaming and singing, Ceaseless and sorrowless we! The glory about us clinging Of the glorious futures we see,
Our souls with high music ringing; O men! It must ever be
That we dwell in our dreaming and singing, A little apart from ye. (Arthur O'Shaughnessy 1873.)

2014-04-02 08:40:34

Hi,
The series really went down hill when mophat joined the team. I only like a few of the newers ones, and i don't even think they're written by him. To be totally honest, 2005 to 2006 were the best of the new series. Even then, they're lacking in some of the enjoyment that i get from 1963-1989.

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2014-04-02 09:51:54

Yep, Mophat has pretty much killed new doctor who and ruined what should have been an interesting Doctor in mat smith, and lets not even talk about retconning the time war. I actually now am of the opinion that the 8th doctor used the moment, and died in the process, and the 9th and 10th doctors are the Doctor's final dying delusion coming to terms with what he has done, until he finally sacrifices his life for a very ordinary man while stopping the time lords once again and so leaves the universe  entirely, because at the end of The End of Time, ---- yes, I would rather see the doctor dead than mophed big_smile.

Regarding the previous new who however, I never liked Ecleston on first watching (accept perhaps in Dalek), however I have sort of revised my opinion slightly sinse then, and now I tend to  think the 2005 season was more a matter of getting into the swing of things. perhaps Ecleston would've made a better doctor had he stayed around. The final story with bad wolf also deserves a mention for being the most epic Dalek invasion ever, albeit I really disliked the rather bolted on religious dogmatism which didn't exactly fit the Daleks very well (one review I've read simply says the daleks were religious because Davies is an atheist).

2006 I agree was a major high point and it's still one of my favourite series, from the return of Sarah jane, to  the Rose/doctor thing which actually did work with Tenant and at that point hadn't been over played into the ground, and of course the new redesigned cybermen (I love the  way they're huge  metal and clunky), and it actually was an occasion where the overly emotional  finale worked because of the Rose/doctor relationship, something which didn't quite come together as well in any other  new season finale.

2007  had some nice ideas, but I never really rated Martha jones. She just felt like a cut price version of rose with no real distinguishing  features. I've also slightly changed my view of the new master, sinse where previously I always thought it was a little too overblown and too much of a deus ex, these days I actually appreciate the fact that  Davies went as far as he did in terms of  devastation, fashist orders in Britain and major torture of main characters. Of course this was the same time as the first season of Torch wood which also went far too far into violence dodgy relationships and moral ambiguity, so it's possible davies was on a roll with that one, still after seeing Mophat who can't have anything bad ever happen without some ridiculous half explained retcon the conclusion to season 7 seems almost sane for all I'd say it's probably the weakest of the tenth doctor's run.

2008, aka new season 4 is actually another favourite of mine. Donna is probably the most unique new who companion sinse she doesn't have a thing for the doctor, they're just friends. She also doesn't have an annoying family or any of the other sterriotypes (her grandpa is even a companion in his own right). We also had the origin of the Ood, the doctor visiting pompay and the most actually threatening Sontarans I've seen sinse The Sontaran experiment. Even Marthaa actually improved and grew as a character (as in fact she'd done in torchwood), turning into a compitant and rather hard bitten  unit soldier, not just a rose clone.

The only thing that lets down season 4 for me  is the finale in Stolen Earth/journey's end.  Not only did they not get terry molloy to come back and play Davros (even though he literally phoned the bbc and offered to do it for nothing), but also davies tried to stick so much into two short episodes you ended up with a  confusing mess. Sarah Jane and her friend from the Sj tv series, a complete dalek invasion across the world, the Torchwood crew doing goodness knows what, harriet jones, martha threatening to blow the world up etc. The conclusion also really disappointed me, rose gets to go off with a clone version of the doctor, ---- a blatant attempt to keep the shippers and fan fic romancers happy and the first time Doctor who employed a get out of  bad consequences free card (something it now does every week thanks to his mophasty, but was very annoying at the time). There was just so much neither sarah, nor Davros, nor donna's mind wipe really got the attention they deserved which was a shame.

The 2009  specials varied a lot for me, though i really wish Tenant had just done a propper 5th season instead. Planet of the dead was entertaining as a random peace of theatre, but didn't make much sense as a story, and the thief who sort of filled in for the doctor's companion had no personality other than being some  aristocratic lady who liked steeling antiques. Waters of mars on the other hand is pure awsome, from references to the ice warriors, to a distinctly scary enemy, to the Doctor actually going wrong in a serious way which lead perfectly into the end of time.

Actually I enjoyed end of time, the master rocks, and while turning the hole world into masters was a bit silly and less than well explained, the return of the timelords and showing just why the doctor actually did what he did during the time war was nice, it was also great to see David tenant playing a  Doctor who realized he'd gone too far and was at the end of his time, but didn't want to quit, especially next to someone of the calibre of Bernard cribbins. Donna's mind wipe also got more of the attention it missed in the end of new season 4.

I also thought the Doctor regenerated for the right reason. In the end not sacrificing himself in some grand gesture or to stop an invincible army, but just for one old man, and his final send off set peace while a little overly sentimental did fit the mood of the  story.

then unfortunately the moph took over and almost from the instant the eleventh hour starts you've got something that is no longer doctor who, indeed when the doctor was having random cravings and fighting off killer old people I thought "what childish shenanigans is this?" and that was even before we'd met the far more irritating riversong or been exposed to the  shallowness of the pond. Suffice it to say I've pretty much dispared of Tv who sinse then, and though I'll still watch it on first  broadcast in the faint hope of a half decent story (like the silurian return), the general quality and the over all seires resolution has just gone.

Regarding new who vs the older stuff, one thing new who (or at least pre mophat new who), gave the series was something it needed. Firstly ongoing character arcs, and secondly  the ability to be epic. IN the older seires, comparatively few  companions really had much of a personal story or background,  nor did they really have that much development across different stories. There were exceptions, such as the original 1963  adventures with Susan, barbara and Ian,Ace's ongoing plot arc that actually wouldn't seem out of place in new who, and of course Adrek's death which has gained a lot of praise over the years and is really a shocker, however on average classic who did treat companions as somewhat static.

I also appreciate that new who has often gone to darker depths than  a lot of classic who, or at least it did under davies in terms of showing the doctor  and his companions tortured, hurt, scared etc, and having actual personal consequences. Not all of classic who of course, sinse episodes like Vengens on varos or infurno did have some pretty bad stuff, but certainly a surprising amount. similarly new who shows the positive  bennifits people get from traveling with the doctor and the fact that people change.

ironically, I noticed that in the bf stories post new who, this quality of consequence actually increased quite a lot, with stories like Perry and the piscan paradox or the roof of the world exploring character backgrounds and what they're like when they return. Of course it did! happen occasionally before, witness the 8th doctor and Charly (probably the best romantic plot who has ever seen, sinse it goes beyond just  companion telling the doctor what she feels for him and explores what happens after), but now we get to see for example how Nissa becomes a quite different person, or what Tegan's life after travelling with the Doctor was like.

Heck, there is even a companion chronicle in which an older jo grant visits the 3rd Doctor and discusses with him what has happened to her sinse.

So while I tend to think Mophat is a self important idiot who has systematically destroyed everything good about doctor who including basic rules of story telling and turned it into a bloated mess of flashy pointless effects and utter lack of plot, I don't actuallyt hink the 2005 revival was a bad thing, sinse under davies despite more than a few rocky  moments it gave us some good stories and also gave some things to Doctor who (in the form of the Bf audios), that it needed.

now if only someone would kindly exterminate Steven Mophat or at least give him the sack maybe there would be half a chance of there being some semi decent doctor who on Tv again, and perhaps I might even admit that the Doctor has encarnations after his tenth big_smile.

Oopse! this was never intended to be quite this much of an essay, ---- wow I really get going when i start on about my favourite time lord big_smile.

With our dreaming and singing, Ceaseless and sorrowless we! The glory about us clinging Of the glorious futures we see,
Our souls with high music ringing; O men! It must ever be
That we dwell in our dreaming and singing, A little apart from ye. (Arthur O'Shaughnessy 1873.)