2019-01-17 21:12:42

In relation to that "End of Men" topic, I'm curious what everyone's perception of being a man exactly is.  Part of this also spawns from this news-worthy ad: 


       https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=koPmuEyP3a0


    I mean, as awkward as it is for a men's related shaving company to be posting something like this, the responses on what a man should be from various writers on news sites, and random comments has been a bit of a view on the various perceptions of manhood.  Personally I just find this video a bit awkward in general, and think a group more experienced with the subject matter should of handled a message like this.   However, in a meta way, it does sort of give the message of "Men have the power to change and are fully capable of running into this arena," as a men's related hygiene product feels that it can throw itself into the ring. 



      I believe that men are capable of shifting change with their own hands, especially with the power we hold in society.  As well, I believe men have a competitive nature, and seek to challenge themselves throughout their lifetime.  If women want to step into a higher level of society and more aggressively compete against us, bring it on.  We don't need barriers to prove who is better as individuals, and people should figure out their place in the overall order of things.  And once this order is established, we then focus on protecting everyone and performing our duties.

    Men have mostly built up society in the past, which is why I find it awkward that some people uphold the more savage and brutish nature of men more suited to the wild.  And before someone tells me that this is some opinion that an SJW feminist wrote, that type of thinking is reflected in places like the NRA that men were born to be violent and dangerous (but considering this is an interest group that lobbies for rights of firearms, I guess being dangerous helps with people owning more).  This opinion that men are by nature aggressive and dominant is one that people have expressed out, in various shades of the civilized/wild spectrum of dominant.  (i.e:  protective vs aggressive).



      but as this seems like a fun place to put a collection of views on masculinity down, what is everyone's own personal view of being a man?  And I'm really meaning personal, and not a definition found on a website/book.

The answer to your question is forum.audiogames.net/search

2019-01-18 02:43:24

Men are no better than women, just as women are no better than men. We all suck, because we're human. Humans are all trying to compete against each other because we try to find the tiniest things to put each other down for, such as being a man/woman, black/white, short/tall, fat/skinny or over/under weight, Christian/Islam, Republican/Democrat... yeah, you get the picture. I don't care about what you are, I care about who you are. If you're a cyber bully who gets their kicks off of insulting people for no reason on the internet because you think they're stupid, then I'm gonna hate your guts and stop talking to you. If you're someone who manages a big business and sells things and constantly gets stomped on by people and everyone tells you that you're talking out of your ass, then I'm gonna do my best to support you every step of the way to the best of my abilities. So again, I don't care about how you look on the outside, it's the inside that counts.

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2019-01-18 05:37:02 (edited by flackers 2019-01-18 06:51:33)

Hehehehe, , advertisers go to all this trouble, and if you can't see, half the time you haven't a clue what they're advertising. That tickles me no end. As for what it means to be a man: I think humans have created a society in which our primal instincts and physiology, that kept our ancestors alive through all those billions of years of evolution, aren't as relevant as they were. So we're stuck with gender behaviours that don't necessarily match where we are as a species. Males and females had much more clearly defined roles in more primitive societies. If you just watch what happens when a group of men and women are sat around on a summer evening while the children play near by. If there's a sound of distress from the kids, the women are on the case before the men have even realised something's up. Men in general are more single-minded and competitive, and less group orientated. Women are more likely to help the group. The women are more likely to ask people if they need anything. They tend to be the ones who go inside and prepare snacks for everyone. They want to look after the group and make everyone comfortable. Men seem to be more self-centred: every man for himself. All those Christmas days in my family: it was definitely the women who went out of their way to make the day festive. It was the women who made most of the food and made the place look Christmassy. To be honest, the men just mostly sat around and took stuff, lol. You could go on for an hour about how men and women are different, but it would involve making unfashionable generalisations, and treading on political eggshells. We are different, but times are strange and roles are becoming muddled. Barring a catastrophe, basic day-to-day survival isn't an issue for modern humans, so we have the freedom to mess around with our positions.

2019-01-18 07:25:45

Women are generally better planners, better long term and logical thinkers. They are generally more empathic in nature, able to feel the pain of others and help in emotional turmoil. They are probably harder workers, when work is not always physical, but of course, they do that too. A woman will generally work all day and not complain. They are highly detail oriented, noticing things men simply don't; putting this to work as designers, and architects and things of that nature.

Men are usually more in your face aggressive, more competitive, usually physically stronger, usually taller. Men are influenced more by their ego, and strong emotions like pride. Men are worse at separating their emotions from their work, they let it influence decisions it should not influence. Men will go directly after what they want, tending towards directly asserting themselves. They will use tactical maneuvering less, and prefer a frontal assault. Men are usually not detail oriented. It is speculated that women can see a wide variety of colors and shades that men cannot.

Those are some things, not a total list, and really only from what I can gather. And yes, I know that not everyone is going to fall under every one of those behaviors, I shouldn't need to put a disclaimer on everything saying I understand that these are generalizations and don't apply to all people.

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2019-01-18 09:46:26

What is a man"

A miserable pile of secrets. But enough talk; have at you!

... I'm like 10 years late with that, amn't I? sad

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2019-01-19 06:19:08 (edited by The Dwarfer 2019-01-19 06:20:38)

What is a man?
I guess not me.
See, you see these advertisers, the studies, the people who idk, portray men as self-centered and competitive, ya know... fast cars and guns and bar room brawls, stronger, taller, dominant, but none of those describe me. I think way too much and try to see myself as equal to everyone else. It doesn't surprise me when a female is physically stronger than me, because I know several that are. Well? They work out rigorously and I don't, choosing to write long, wordy, emotional stories and code games instead.
  If you ask me, gender roles are some of the most limiting, damaging things in today's society. Telling someone how they aught to be because of what gender they are is... illogical to me. Maybe there was once a time where it made sense, but even then it would and could never be a 100% fits all thing. A warrior? A protector? A hunter? Me? Bwahahaha! My sister would probably be better equipped to do those things at this point. Gender roles especially in today's society literally just exist to try to make things be what they are not and end up holding things back.
  I see myself as no better than a woman because of her gender. That's stupid. At the same time I don't think they should be treated any differently because of it. Like I don't condone sexual harassment, but on the opposite side of the coin, I don't think it's my duty to protect women or treat them special because they're women. Again, that's stupid. We're all human, and there's no reason to define how someone should live their life and or be treated by others because of a chromosome. And for this reason, those advertisers can continue pumping out material, the feminists can continue writing, the NRA can continue roaring and sticking out their hairy chests, but I don't hear any of them. I have never felt the need to demean women for being women, and I don't intend to start now. I have never felt the need to live like a "man", and again, I don't intend to start now. So may your words fall on deaf ears.

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2019-01-19 06:32:47

That's exactly what I was thining when I read the topic title.

CAE_Jones wrote:

What is a man"

A miserable pile of secrets. But enough talk; have at you!

... I'm like 10 years late with that, amn't I? sad

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2019-01-19 20:04:32

At Post 5:   I hate you so much for bringing up that reference, but it was bound to happen.  Heh. 



      You know, I wonder if a better way of describing our current era is one where gender roles shouldn't even exist.  Dwarfer has noted that the old roles no longer apply to everyone even if some primal instincts still exist.  Maybe it might be time to drop on seeing how a gender should act, and have a more general idea on how people should be treating one another as a collective.

The answer to your question is forum.audiogames.net/search

2019-01-20 00:53:55

I agree with a good deal of this, though I'm not so fond of gender-based stereotypes. For instance, if you met a person who looked female but identified as male, and you did a study on their brain, would they actually portray the so-called "male" characteristics more than those often associated with so-called "femininity"?

I think it's limiting, to talk about gender roles and all that. The way I see it is that the very difficulty in defining what a man is proves my point.

Here's how I see it.

Do you identify as male, regardless of the gender you were assigned at birth by those around you, and regardless of your genitalia?
Are you above the age of majority, or at the very least at an age where you can expect to be functioning like an adult in most senses?
If you answered yes to both, then you're a man.
And even that definition is imperfect, because there are adults with mental challenges, who will forever possess diminished mental capacity, who I would still call men instead of boys.

I was born male, and that's how I identify. I use "he/his" pronouns, and I have no problem with them. But I don't have any especial kinship with men. Nor with women. Nor with any gender, really. I am me. I don't feel particularly competitive most of the time. I do favour emotion over brute force. I like planning, doing things for people, analytical thinking. I enjoy brightening the days of others. I am the guy who's going to ask my friends how they're getting on, and can I help them in any way. I'm the guy who might shed a tear for you if you're struggling, literally I mean, not just figuratively. I'm the guy who, instead of wanting to hit you for making me angry, will want to tear you apart verbally (I rarely get this mad, but it does happen sometimes). So by a lot of traditional gender expectations, I'd present as female in a lot of ways. Yet I don't choose to bother with all of that. Others can, and I won't fault them, but I don't. My gender does not mean all that much to me. I say again: I am me.

The only reason that defining gender matters to some people is that they (these people, I mean) have historically been on the bottom of the pile. Put another way, it's very easy for us males to say "everyone should be treated equally" because we're really not losing all that much. Or when we do, we as a group tend to howl about it, even if what we're losing should never have been ours in the first place. So I guess what I'm coming around to is this: sometimes it is going to feel like the gender and rights and whatnot of non-males matters more, and in the short term you'd be right. But in the long-term, this is how equality is going to happen. You can't just hand-wave thousands of years of oppression. No one actively wants to create oppression in new ways, or rather, no one reputable wants this, so any pushback will eventually result in a better outcome. It may feel like women are louder/as if they're being pandered to more, but that's only because of the absence of this in the past. As time passes, it will even out. That's what we're all after.

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2019-01-20 11:31:22

I think one can identify as male, have lived for 16-30 years, and still not identify as man.

看過來!
"If you want utopia but reality gives you Lovecraft, you don't give up, you carve your utopia out of the corpses of dead gods."
MaxAngor wrote:
    George... Don't do that.

2019-01-20 21:51:04

with the absence of gender roles, there are no defining characteristics of man. Male, yes, as it's a biological term, man, no.

I don't see gender roles as problematic at all. As long as we don't try to force the people around us into said roles and we realize that we have the power to branch out from those roles if we wish to, I see no problem. It's like a blueprint for a prototype, a design, maybe even a mold or a casting, but we can change that casting to suit our personality, it doesn't bind us. I submit then, if we removed all defining characteristics that compose a gender role, where are those baseline values. It would seem to me that people would then fall into the category of neuter, which is fine if that's how they truly feel, but they should know what options they have.

Have gender roles been abused, yes, but what has been placed in humanity's path that has not been. We're an intrinsically flawed species. So I think it is wrong to judge someone for how they are. Things like, "You're not man enough", or, "what kind of woman does X" where x is some activity a woman should not do according to gender roles. As long as we realize it's able to be changed, an outline that's still being prepared, a form with details yet to be filled in, etc. I don't see the problem.

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