Once upon a time there was a totally bodacious and like completely laid-back prince who was like so totally a dude.
His father the king and pretty much most everyone else had gone off to war to fight vampires, however that was like totally not the princes style and waaaay too uncool, so he sat in the highest tower of his castle brushing out his long hair.
The one problem the prince had is he’d love to meet a waaaay hot princess babe, however he was just too relaxed to go anywhere. Then, remembering how these things worked he decided if he just hung out, like hung his hair out of the window a totally knockout princess chick was sure to come along and climb it.
Unfortunately for the prince, the first person to turn up was not a princess, but a lion in a really bad mood. Several other fairy tales had left him with aching paws, a bad stomach from eating too much peacock and mouse, an annoying New York accent he couldn’t get rid of and a tendency to avoid the winter and mortally afraid of any lady with a pale complexion, so he was feeling decidedly out of sorts.
Seeing a huge mass of hair running down the castle wall he mistook it for a thicket and wondered if there might be a squirrel stuck in their he could snack on, so he grabbed and pulled.
Down came the prince, causing a lot of damage to the castle and windows which would take the local crafters a huge amount of time slowly collecting different materials to fix. The Lion, in a fit of pique gobbled up the Prince (despite the lingering taste of sun tan lotion funny smelling weeds). This however was a mistake, since the huge mass of hair stuck in the Lion’s throat and irritated him horribly.
A nice natured local cleric, who'd just buffed his defense stat and was looking forward to buying that holy plus three mace the local weapon shop had on special offer, wandered by and seeing a creature in such destressed decided to cure the lion by squeezing the juice of several peaches down his throat.
The lion however was not in a mood to be cured, and when the cleric attempted this the lion proceeded to swallow the cleric hole, (peaches were not the clerric's favoured weapon so his attack rolls with them were at a massive penalty).
This was a problem since the cleric had his amazon Echo in his pocket, meaning that from then on, wherever the lion went Alexa’s voice called suggesting he subscribe to amazon prime and get next day delivery on the finest quality gazelles.
This persistent advertising blaring all over the place, not to mention a severely saw throat, the lion found he could no longer hunt effectively, so his position as top carnivore was taken by the wolf.
And the moral of this story? Give peache a chance!
Okay that insanity over, here is the news.
First off, the Lion, the wolves, the castle and! The cleric in the above extremely random tale came from a very notable update.
Breakerbox games, makers of Airik the cleric, Kirtwolf and several other titles are back in business.
Now, all their games are available, including the two side scrolling adventures of the winged lion Grif and their latest complex adventure gamethe still in development edge of winter.
You can buy the games individually, or you can get all of the games at the knockdown price of 24 usd.
Demos are all also available that let you try the games out before you buy, and all of the games have been updated to run on Windows from 7 to 10.
For more information, as well as links to buy the games and find the demos, check out This topic
Then, we have a developer back with a new project. Jsenter, known for the highly addictive world building game for Ios Nano empire is back with a new project, this time something which does not build new worlds, but puts ours in danger.
The 7 year old prince defeated the robot queen with his amazing cuteness. Now however, he’s devising a robot free state and you as a citizen have to be part of it.
Cooperate with others by liking or disliking the prince's messages in this social media simulator to build a new world ruled over by a 7 year old dictator. The game is currently in beta testing and is slated for a January 2017 release, however the developer is looking for beta testers to make sure everything plays nicely with voiceover.
Find out more about the game Here on Jsenter’s website, and leave comments or contact the developer Here in this topic
Now our above little tale said to give peach a chance, and you can do that thanks to Dardar of Nathantech. He’s taken time away from Cosmic rage to give us a cute puzzle similar to candy crush entitled Peaches and cream.
No, you don’t get free desserts for playing, but you do get to match up symbols on a 3x3 board, then see the board increase in size as you level up and enhance your puzzle making skills.
[Find out more or downloadify the game Here on Nathan tech's websiteand leave comments, feedback etc In this here topic
Then we have several updates on the table. First off is everyone’s favorite game of production and slave labor with no wages, Crafting kingdom on Ios.
This latest update fixes some bugs, including problems with speaking of numerals, tweaks some of the quests, and best of all adds the ability to save a game to the cloud so you can play on multiple devices.
Next up, Warsim has received yet more updatery, including an entire new vampire city as well as more new races, nations etc than you can shake a diamond studded, cheap, tacky, expensive, glowing, mutant stick at.
Of course this is one where you will need to buy the full game to get access to the array of updates, but it’s well worth it (especially considering the game costs just five quid).
For more info and to chat with Wastelander himself, see This topic
Lastly, here is some miner news about Alexa, the annoying lady who wants you all to buy amazon prime, mmmm, I mean the amazon voice assistant program available on devices such as the Echo and echo dot. Since some annoying fellow called Dark has finally! Got off his arse and checked this new platform out, he has compiled This list of amazon/alexa audiogames complete with short descriptions and comments. So anyone interested in Dark's thoughts (unlikely I know), or interested what audiogames are around on this immerging platform which even includes complete voice control are welcome to have a look.
Now I’m off for some Peach and quiet!
Our souls with high music ringing; O men! It must ever be
That we dwell in our dreaming and singing, A little apart from ye. (Arthur O'Shaughnessy 1873.)