I'm very sad to announce that Nocturnus, who has been a faithful moderator and database editer here for the last three years has decided to step down from the position.
His reasons for doing such, and a very eloquent message to the Agnet community is detailed in his below announcement.
Before getting to that, it just remains to say a big thank you to Nocturnus for all his hard work on the forum, and to hope that even if he is not staying on in an official capacity, he'll still be around when he can sharing his thoughts, philosophy and insites on everything from gaming to cartoons.
Goodluck, and farewell.
Frrom Nocturnus
.
I'll first offer my sincerest thanks to anyone who is reading
this.
It is with a heavy heart and a bit more that I have decided
it is
time to step down from moderation duties on this site. To
most of you
this may come as a surprise, given that I have done my
best to
advocate for the moderation panel as best I could while
remaining as
neutral as possible. This is, however, a decision that has
been long
coming and which I've managed to sweep under the rug,
as it were, for
a fair amount of time given a couple of things I will outline
for you
as best I can.
First and most important of the two, my hearing. For
those of you who
don't know, I have struggled with my hearing for most of
my life, a
problem that began when my ears were hit by multiple ear
infections
and surgeries for various reasons on various occasions.
Eventually
the left eardrum was severely punctured, and while the
hole healed,
the hearing loss that came with it left a noticeable scar. It
is
believed that antibiotics I took to rid myself of the
seemingly
countless ear infections may have also contributed to my
hearing loss;
imagine that, trying to help the ear becomes the culprit to
some
extent.
To simplify tings, while the left ear is still capable of
hearing, it
is no longer truly capable of interpreting those things
properly,
meaning that were it not for my right ear, I would more
than likely be
unable to cary on any sort of conversation whatsoever.
My right ear
itself is not in the best of shape however, and my visit to
the
audiologist a couple of weeks ago revealed some startling
information;
my hearing is getting worse. What makes this still mnore
frightening
is that she is unsure of what is causing the change and
cannot tell
weather or not it will stop or how long it would take to
lose my
hearing entirely if it didn't. While she was not willing to
advise
given that she knows and perhaps shares to some extent
my love for
anything and everything audio related, part of the
conversation that
followed after the hearing test was slightly awkward,
giving me reason
to believe she would rather I not tax my ears any further in
an
attempt to save as much of my hearing as I have left,
which I am only
too eager to comply with, owing to the fact that hearing is
my primary
gateway to the world. it is very possible, perhaps
probable that I
myself, since I have suffered hearing loss have contributed
to it
given that I can no longer really judge volume levels that
are safe
for me and have at least once a month for the past 10
years overdone
things, particularly when gaming and projects involving
audio
production.
The second matter is perhaps not as important and could
probably
continue to be ignored, but I have felt an increasing
amount of
sadness when looking at posts over the past year or so.
the first
time I truly noticed it because the proverbial door was
sort of kicked
open by force, as it were, was in the swamp topic. There
came a day
when I was made aware that swamp was down for an
unknown amount of
time given to hackers striking it again as hackers are
generally in
the position of doing, I guess. I'll not claim that swamp
was my
favorite game of all time, but it did bring something to me
that many
other games could not... Nastalgia. I grew up playing first
person
shooters with mission objectives thrown in for good
measure, and swamp
was, I believed, on the right path. To see it attacked was
a personal
insult for so many reasons, not least of which is that it was
free at
the time, that so much work had been put into it, that so
many ideas
had been thrown around and discussed, and much, much
more I won't go
into to try and keep this as short as possible.
Perhaps it is only my perception, but I feel in every ounce
of my
being that this negativity has increased among the
audiogaming
community, which is a shame given that we are so small in
size and
haven't half of the resources that massive developers and
companies
that produce games for the mainstream market have at
their disposal.
I don't hold any one person responsible for this; I think it's
time to
step back and look at the big picture collectively and see
it for what
it is. Perhaps there is some truth to the naysayers' claim
that
nothing worth writing home about has been released
recently, but I
won't make that decision alone and I don't think any of us
should. ON
the other hand, the games that have already been brought
to the table
are proof of what can be done when the community
works together in its
various areas of expertise.
some of us are good writers, good speakers, good with
words in general
and can review games well on top of providing
promotion. Others are
good at looking for bugs and troubleshooting. Still others
have a
talent for working with sound I will most certainly never
surpass.
Some of us have these three abilities and many more to
offer alogn
with remarkable qualities and personalities, and while I do
not
believe it should be obligatory to help out a community if
one does
not wish to do so, I would certainly love to see what might
happen if
more of us stepped to the plate and contributed our
diverse abilities,
bringing everything we have to the table in an attempt to
stride
forward rather than falling back, putting aside the tensions
and
frictions that seem to lie just beneath the surface.
One could argue that my vision is unrealistic, that it could
never
happen owing to our nature, and maybe that's true. It is
however, my
belief that some of the standards developers of
audiogames are being
held to are just as unrealistic. yes, we have technology,
more
technology now than we could have imagined, but there
are still kinks
to be worked out, problems to be tackled, and more
importantly, lives
to be lived, and they can't all revolve around gaming.
something
needs to give if we want more games with more quality
and more
variety, something more productive and creative than
destructive
criticism and negativity and pessimism. One could argue
that these
are part of life and that is true, but nothing should stop us
from
being the best we can be.
And now I take my leave. I'll be around. I thank you all
for your
attention, support you have provided in the past when I've
worked on
various things, and any support that may come my way
this time around.
The community as a whole is in my thoughts and prayers
and always will
be.
Our souls with high music ringing; O men! It must ever be
That we dwell in our dreaming and singing, A little apart from ye. (Arthur O'Shaughnessy 1873.)